Some laughs for the weekend

My laptop is not behaving very well today, so I'll quickly post this very funny video Mrsgunka sent me. I like this couple's gentle, self-deprecating, old fashioned humour.

Thank you, Mrsgunka.

Whistling...

Peter and I sleep in separate bedrooms. The reason is practical, we simply like to get a good night's sleep. In the past, I had his enormous, very heavy hand land on my face (a very disturbing experience in the middle of the night!), he snores very loudly, I fidget, we both get up to answer the calls of nature several times each night, we also have restless legs, talk in our sleep... the list is endless.

Tired (literally) of sharing a bed with something akin to a noisy mountain goat, we both decided that we'd be better off in our own rooms.

I know what you're thinking...

The following joke is about separate beds, but provides a very good solution!

A young couple got married and spent their honeymoon in a hotel with twin beds.

The shy young bride was a bit anxious and asked her new husband:

"But how are we going to do... you know what... How would I know you're in the mood?"

He replied:

"No problem, darling. I'll whistle and you come to my bed."

She was still worried:

"Yes, but how do I let you know when I'm in the mood?"

He was very reassuring:

"Well, you just ask me: 'Did I hear you whistle?'"

This is our favourite joke. He he he...

It's hot today

I'm in the mood for some South American music. It goes well with the hot weather!



[And also to celebrate the Supreme Court decision to uphold the Affordable Care Act! It's a happy tune...]

When love ends

Annie Girardot was a great actress. In this segment, without saying a single word, she tells us everything...

Loudmouth

It happened again... A joke arrived from Mrsgunka, quickly followed by Grammy97 with the same joke. Synchronized sense of humour, that's what it is!

Thank you, ladies.

After a very busy day, a commuter settled down in her seat and closed her eyes as the train departed Montreal for Hudson.


As the train rolled out of the station, the guy sitting next to her pulled out his cell phone and started talking in a loud voice: "Hi sweetheart, it’s Eric, I’m on the train – yes, I know it’s the six thirty and not the four thirty but I had a long meeting .... – no, honey, not with that floozie from the accounts office, with the boss. No sweetheart, you’re the only one in my life – yes, I’m sure, cross my heart" etc., etc.

Fifteen minutes later, he was still talking loudly, when the young woman sitting next to him, who was obviously angered by this interminable, loud, inane conversation, yelled at the top of her voice:

"Hey, Eric, turn that stupid phone off and come back to bed!"

Eric no longer uses his cell phone in public.

Peace...

I've been a tad busy chasing my darling son, who's been giving us a bit too much to worry about lately. He seems to be on the right track to resolve his recent woes.

So I chose to post a calming picture. I would love to sit on those steps, basking in the sun, reading a good book and sipping a cool drink...

Feathered beauty

View_From_Here sent me some spectacular photos of birds a few days ago, but most of the pictures didn't download, so I tried to find them elsewhere on the internet, to no avail. Yesterday, Mrsgunka sent me the same photos, saying: "For View.... Our beautiful feathered friends!"

I thought it was wonderful, Mrsgunka unwittingly coming to the rescue and dedicating the photos to View.

A big thank you to both of them.

[As there are too many pictures, please click on one of them to see all of them larger in the lightbox.]

Too modern for me

Picture this: A guy is going out with a girl he disappointed three years ago but who still loved him enough to take him back and has supported and believed in him for the past six months.

Out of the blue, he refriends his latest ex on Facebook. It doesn't go down very well with the long suffering present girlfriend. Not content with the refriending, this guy goes on to post a comment on an old photo of himself lying with the ex on a beach like two lovebirds: "I would give the world to have this back."

Am I too old-fashioned to think that this is the behaviour of a cad? Am I out of step in thinking that Facebook is not the best place to break up with your present girlfriend in such a sneaky but very public way? Am I a lunatic to believe that a real man does it face-to-face, in a compassionate and considerate way, giving the girl a chance to say how she feels in order to achieve some closure?

I don't know if I'm finally getting too old for these newfangled social network interactions, but I'm very disappointed in somebody very near to me and I needed to vent!

May I have the pleasure of this dance?

This lovely waltz with an Italian flavour was composed in 1917 by a fifteen-year-old, Alberto Marino, son of immigrants from Calabria. Bras used to be a very Italian quarter of Sao Paulo, Brazil. I'm not sure if it has retained the same character these days, as Sao Paulo never stops growing and changing...

Respect my authority!

This is from Mrsgunka:

A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas , where he talked with an old rancher.

He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs."

The rancher said, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there," as he pointed out the location.

The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, "Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me!"

Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.

"See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... on any land!!! No questions asked or answers given!!! Have I made myself clear??? Do you understand ???"

The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......

With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.

The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs.....

"Your badge, show him your BADGE........ !!!"

Thank you, Mrsgunka.

Patience...

Grammy97 sent me this lovely joke:

A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly behaved 3 year-old grandson. It's obvious to her that he has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets in the candy aisle, cookies in the cookie aisle; and for fruit, cereal and soda in the other aisles.

Meanwhile, Grandad is working his way around, saying in a controlled voice, "Easy, William, we won't be long, easy, boy."

Another outburst, and she hears the granddad calmly say, "It's okay, William, just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there, boy."

At the checkout, the little terror is throwing items out of the cart, and Grandad says again in a calm and controlled voice, "William, William, relax buddy, don't get upset. We'll be home in five minutes; stay cool, William."

Very impressed, the woman goes outside where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car.

She said to the elderly gentleman, "It's none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. That whole time, you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying that things would be okay.”

Grandad smiled, and the woman said, “William is very lucky to have you as his grandpa."

"Thanks," said the grandfather, "but I'm William....... the little shit's name is Kevin."

Thank you, Grammy97.

On being serious...

Not serious in 1954...

Another year, another birthday...

After I turned 30, I had my first baby and thought: "This is it, time to grow up and get serious."

It didn't happen. Then I turned 40.

Nope.

50 came soon enough and it still didn't happen.

Now I'm one year shy of my 60th and I'm beginning to suspect that I'll never be a real grown-up or get serious.

Just older...

Miracle

Mrsgunka has an endless supply of lovely short jokes (lucky us!).

A religious farmer lost his Bible out in the field.

A few days later he went to answer a noise at his door. Standing there was a cow, with his Bible in its mouth!

The farmer raised his eyes to heaven and thanked the Lord for this miracle.

"Not really," said the cow. "Your name was written inside."

Thank you, Mrsgunka.

*****

This is a good cartoon to accompany this joke:

La Vezere

It's a glorious day here (for a change) and we went for a walk by the river after lunch. It's nice and cool, with the lovely relaxing noise of the water going through the rocks. Here's the Vezere, where they do the kayaking competitions during the summer:

And here is a little bit with sound: