Monday, 6 May 2013
Des mots - A silly game
This is supposed to be a very silly game. I selected nine words (mots) in French. The game is to provide an English word for each mot, WITHOUT googling! The object of the game is to be creative and amusing, not to get it right.
Those of you who know French, just go with the flow and invent something silly, yes?
1) Pastèque
2) Gazon
3) Cafard
4) Chouette
5) Frelon
6) Chauve-souris
7) Robinet
8) Vis
9) Ramoneur
Sunday, 5 May 2013
Saturday, 4 May 2013
A walk into the past
I was born in a young country, discovered in 1500. The age of certain structures in Europe never ceases to amaze me. There are pre-historical sites dotted all over the place, but they tend to be cordoned off and in some cases you need to buy tickets, they're not part of everyday life.
The other day we embarked on a long walk to the oldest part of the village, where the first houses were built around the year 800, in a place called "Les Eglises." It's now a cemetery. We had to pass the younger parts of the village, such as the Vieux Pont, built in 1492.
Looking back, from the same spot:
After we crossed the bridge, a very steep hill awaited us.
We went up and up and there were fantastic photo opportunities from such a vantage point.
We finally arrived at the oldest thing in the village, a fountain that had existed for centuries before being "christianized" by a Breton abbot (St Méen) who lived from 520 to 617. It's not very easy to find, you have to walk around the cemetery, then cross a little bridge to get there.
The cool water was very refreshing after the long uphill walk!
We haven't been able to walk very much lately because of the rain, but as soon as it gets reliably sunny again, we plan to visit the "Pierre des Druides," allegedly a pagan sacrificial site. It's in the middle of the woods between our village and a little hamlet. I hope we don't get lost!
One of these days I'll post some photos of the prettiest houses in the centre of the village. They're much younger than the fountain, as they were built between the 13th and 16th centuries...
The other day we embarked on a long walk to the oldest part of the village, where the first houses were built around the year 800, in a place called "Les Eglises." It's now a cemetery. We had to pass the younger parts of the village, such as the Vieux Pont, built in 1492.
Looking back, from the same spot:
After we crossed the bridge, a very steep hill awaited us.
We went up and up and there were fantastic photo opportunities from such a vantage point.
We finally arrived at the oldest thing in the village, a fountain that had existed for centuries before being "christianized" by a Breton abbot (St Méen) who lived from 520 to 617. It's not very easy to find, you have to walk around the cemetery, then cross a little bridge to get there.
The cool water was very refreshing after the long uphill walk!
We haven't been able to walk very much lately because of the rain, but as soon as it gets reliably sunny again, we plan to visit the "Pierre des Druides," allegedly a pagan sacrificial site. It's in the middle of the woods between our village and a little hamlet. I hope we don't get lost!
One of these days I'll post some photos of the prettiest houses in the centre of the village. They're much younger than the fountain, as they were built between the 13th and 16th centuries...
Friday, 3 May 2013
Flowers in coffee pots
I posted this photo a while ago, among a bunch of other very colourful arrangements:
I found another trio of coffee pots with flowers and they're just as delightful!
Looking at the background of both pictures, they belong to the same person, clearly.
I found another trio of coffee pots with flowers and they're just as delightful!
Looking at the background of both pictures, they belong to the same person, clearly.
Labels:
gardening
Thursday, 2 May 2013
Wednesday, 1 May 2013
A night at the pub
View_From_Here sent us this hilarious joke:
I was at the pub the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar.
Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked, "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland?"
One of them angrily screeched, "It's Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!"
So I apologized and replied, "I am so sorry. Are you three whales from Scotland ?"
And that's the last thing I remember.
I was at the pub the other night and overheard three very hefty women talking at the bar.
Their accent appeared to be Scottish, so I approached and asked, "Hello, are you three lassies from Scotland?"
One of them angrily screeched, "It's Wales, Wales you bloody idiot!"
So I apologized and replied, "I am so sorry. Are you three whales from Scotland ?"
And that's the last thing I remember.
Labels:
jokes
Tuesday, 30 April 2013
Bird watching
We ordered some binoculars and they arrived a while ago, together with a little book of photos and descriptions of common garden birds.
So far, I have identified the the majority of the most frequent visitors, but a couple of them have me completely confused. I have to order a better book about the birds of Europe...
We also put a couple of fat and seed balls hanging from the window shutters in the kitchen. The number of customers has been increasing steadily.
These are photos from the internet, as I don't have a decent enough camera to attempt taking my own pictures.
The magpies building their nest have sparked our interest in bird watching. We can't see into the nest at all, but we assume there are young birds there, judging by the movements of the parents. Now we have to wait and try to catch a glimpse of the fledglings leaving the nest.
House sparrows are very common and the females like the seeds we have on offer. They perch on the telephone wire just outside the window, and "piu" quite loudly before coming to the ledge to feed.
We observed a daily continuous ballet in the distance. These birds form fairly large flocks and fly round and round, disappearing behind the trees, then re-emerging where you least expect them. I couldn't tell what they were, even with binoculars. The other day we went to Uzerche, visited the garden centre, then went to a nice bar on the church square for a couple of drinks (TW, CC and IG will remember it). We noticed the same ballet around the church. They were near enough and would land on the roof of the church every now and then, so we finally identified them. Apart from the ballet, there's nothing spectacular about feral pigeons...
Some cousins of the above are far more interesting and look more attractive:
The collared dove is much smaller than the feral pigeon, with a pinkish tinge to its feathers.
Blackbirds are terribly common, but it's nice to observe their behaviour. The females seem to spend long periods on the ground looking for grubs in Monsieur Soup's garden. The males like to use the drums Mr Soup uses to collect rainwater for long baths and a good drink.
I'm not very keen on these. The name alone puts me off.
These finches are lovely and colourful. I was very proud of myself when I managed to identify them. It took me a while to learn to notice markings like bibs and wingbars.
Identifying the great tit correctly was another achievement. From a distance, it's easy to take them for blue tits, but I did notice the black head, white cheeks and broad black stripe on the chest.
The blue tits are our most frequent customers and we're absolutely in love with these cheeky little birds (so is Pirouette).
We hope to see some of the more exotic species as summer approaches and they migrate from Africa. Last year I saw a hoopoe and that was quite a sight!
Bird watching is great fun and for people like us, who used to think "a bird is a bird," being able to tell them apart is very gratifying. Seasoned birdwatchers may laugh at us, but you have to start somewhere...
So far, I have identified the the majority of the most frequent visitors, but a couple of them have me completely confused. I have to order a better book about the birds of Europe...
We also put a couple of fat and seed balls hanging from the window shutters in the kitchen. The number of customers has been increasing steadily.
These are photos from the internet, as I don't have a decent enough camera to attempt taking my own pictures.
![]() |
| Magpie |
![]() |
| Male and female house sparrows |
![]() |
| The ballet |
![]() |
| Feral pigeon |
Some cousins of the above are far more interesting and look more attractive:
![]() |
| Collared dove |
![]() |
| Male blackbird |
![]() |
| Female blackbird |
![]() |
| Carrion crow |
![]() |
| Chaffinch |
![]() |
| Goldfinch |
![]() |
| Great tit |
We hope to see some of the more exotic species as summer approaches and they migrate from Africa. Last year I saw a hoopoe and that was quite a sight!
![]() |
| Hoopoe |
Bird watching is great fun and for people like us, who used to think "a bird is a bird," being able to tell them apart is very gratifying. Seasoned birdwatchers may laugh at us, but you have to start somewhere...
Monday, 29 April 2013
One man's treasure...
Once upon a time, there was a very rich kingdom where the food was famously bland. They had gold and precious stones, but the food was terrible.
A farmer heard about this kingdom and had a clever idea. He filled his largest cart with onions and set off for the rich kingdom of bland food.
The king was puzzled by these strange bulbs, but when the farmer prepared a dish using the wonder ingredient and served it to the king and his advisers, they were delighted. The king wanted all the onions and ordered the farmer's cart to be filled with gold.
The farmer went away very happy and on his way back to his farm, he had already devised a plan to get even richer. He harvested all his garlic, filled the cart again and returned to the rich kingdom of not so bland food.
Once there, he prepared a dish using this new ingredient and served it to the king and his advisers. Their reaction was of pure joy! They told the farmer he would be rewarded and retired to another room to discuss it. The onions were worth a cart full of gold, but the garlic was worth even more!
They told the farmer so, and informed him that his cart was now loaded with their most valuable possessions. The farmer headed to his cart, dreaming of diamonds and precious stones, wishing he had a larger cart.
When he arrived at the king's yard, he found his cart full of onions...
Labels:
funnies
Sunday, 28 April 2013
Saturday, 27 April 2013
O sleep! O gentle sleep!
I'm having trouble going to sleep. One leg jumps, my nose makes an annoying fiiin-fonn noise, I have to get up to pee, random hard-to-scratch places itch, you name it. So I decided to laugh about it...
Labels:
venting
Friday, 26 April 2013
Give us a job - Now with transcript
The conversation below is very funny, but the language is quite colourful and you'll need to listen to it a few times, as he Scottish accent is almost impenetrable.
I was in two minds about posting it because of the language, but Peter talked me into it... He said you all like a good laugh and a challenge!
Here's the transcript. It's not word perfect, but it should make it easier to follow the dialogue:
- Good morning, this is Manpower, Carol speaking, how can I help you?
- Alright doll, I'm looking for a job.
- Okey dokey, what kind of job you're looking for?
- Anything, really, just something to f***g keep the wolves from the door.
- (laugh) You have wolves at your door?
- Aye.
- Ah love... what's you name?
- Bob.
- Bob?
- Bob Clapperton.
- Bob... sorry I missed that.
- Clapperton.
- Clapperton?
- Aye.
- Cla-per-ton. What's your telephone number?
- I'm not telling you, you'll phone us back.
- Well, if you want a job, then I need it.
- I can no hand my phone number to just f***g anybody, like. I just want a job, not a f***g relationship or nothing, ken*?
- I know, I'm not asking you to enter that kind of area of a personal relationship with me, but you know, it would be really helpful.
- Can I no just get a job from ya?
- What? You just phone up and get a job?
- Aye.
- No. It kinda doesn't work like that.
- What do I need to do to get a job?
- Oh, first of all, I need to take your number, then I need to pass it on to the recruitment consultant that would be able to look into what kind of work you're looking for, then he's gonna phone you, then gets you here, then register you, then we get you a job.
- Do I need to go for interviews and all (?) that's a pain in the arse as it is, I just want a job.
- Oh, I know you just want a job, but you really need to come for an interview with us first.
- F**k, s**t, you (?) another company just to get a job? That's a waste of f***g time, no?
- Well, it's entirely up to yourself.
- Well, do you have any jobs or no, that's all I'm asking you.
- Yes, we have jobs.
- Can I get it?
- No, you can't get one over the phone.
- Why the f**k no?
- Because it just doesn't work that way.
- Jesus Christ! Oh f**k, it's a job getting a job in itself, is it no?
- Kinda is like that nowadays.
- Now, hold on, I just want one. For f**k's sake, I'm not greedy.
- Oh, I know you're not greedy, and to get one or to get ten, you still have to come out to the office and register with us.
- I'd rather not do that.
- You don't know whether you'd do that?
- No, I'd rather no do that.
- Then we'd rather not give you the job, because then we can no give jobs to people we haven't met, haven't vetted, haven't referenced.
- Do you do criminal records checks or no?
- No.
- That's alright then, I'd been f***d if you've done that. (laugh)
- (laugh) Now, are you coming to see us or no? Are you going to give me your number or no?
- I can no give you my number 'cause you'll phone us back, that's what I say, I just want a f***g job.
- We can no give you a job without a number.
- F**k. I'll just carry on signing on then.
- (laugh) Just give me your number, ah, oh, honest to God I'll no phone you back till we get... tell you what, I'll book you in so you can come up and register and that's it, but I still need a number.
- We'll you can make an appointment for us, but make sure it's in the afternoon because I like to sleep all morning.
-Well, then, I'm no sure we'll be able to find you a job.
- I can do the night shift, though.
- I got night shift, bloody hell, I'm crying out for night shift!
- Well, I'll do that then.
-Then you need to give me your number.
- I can no give you my number, though, because I can no f***g remember it.
- That's just not on.
- What about I phone you back. I find out the number and I'll phone you back.
- You phone back, then, but the person you need to speak to, his name is Alan.
- Alan?
- Alan, ask for Alan.
- Alright. What's your name?
- Carol.
- I'm going to report you because you've been cheeky to me, so.
- I have no been cheeky to you! (laugh)
- Ok, I'll phone back and speak to Alan later on, but I'm no giving him my number either, so.
- You no give him your number?
- No.
- Then he'll no give you a job.
- So, all I need to do is give a phone number and you give me a job? It's as easy as that?
- No, I just explained. You need to phone up, you need to speak to Alan, he'll take your number, then he'll get you booked in, then you meet Alan, then he'll give you an interview and run over what kind of work you've done before and then he'll give you a job, as long as we get clean references for you and not before that time.
- You'll get no references. I've been self-employed on the night shift all my life.
- What have you been doing?
- Burgling.
- Burgling? Then, then, then, really, obviously we can no get a reference for that, no really, you have no chance of you getting a job.
- So I'm f***d then, That's what you're saying?
- I'm not saying you're f***d exactly, but if you don't give that information, do you know?
- Aah... ah, f**k it, I'll just carry on burgling. Cheers for your help anyway.
- No bother at all. Bye. (laugh)
[*Ken is used in Scotland to mean "understand."]
I was in two minds about posting it because of the language, but Peter talked me into it... He said you all like a good laugh and a challenge!
Here's the transcript. It's not word perfect, but it should make it easier to follow the dialogue:
- Good morning, this is Manpower, Carol speaking, how can I help you?
- Alright doll, I'm looking for a job.
- Okey dokey, what kind of job you're looking for?
- Anything, really, just something to f***g keep the wolves from the door.
- (laugh) You have wolves at your door?
- Aye.
- Ah love... what's you name?
- Bob.
- Bob?
- Bob Clapperton.
- Bob... sorry I missed that.
- Clapperton.
- Clapperton?
- Aye.
- Cla-per-ton. What's your telephone number?
- I'm not telling you, you'll phone us back.
- Well, if you want a job, then I need it.
- I can no hand my phone number to just f***g anybody, like. I just want a job, not a f***g relationship or nothing, ken*?
- I know, I'm not asking you to enter that kind of area of a personal relationship with me, but you know, it would be really helpful.
- Can I no just get a job from ya?
- What? You just phone up and get a job?
- Aye.
- No. It kinda doesn't work like that.
- What do I need to do to get a job?
- Oh, first of all, I need to take your number, then I need to pass it on to the recruitment consultant that would be able to look into what kind of work you're looking for, then he's gonna phone you, then gets you here, then register you, then we get you a job.
- Do I need to go for interviews and all (?) that's a pain in the arse as it is, I just want a job.
- Oh, I know you just want a job, but you really need to come for an interview with us first.
- F**k, s**t, you (?) another company just to get a job? That's a waste of f***g time, no?
- Well, it's entirely up to yourself.
- Well, do you have any jobs or no, that's all I'm asking you.
- Yes, we have jobs.
- Can I get it?
- No, you can't get one over the phone.
- Why the f**k no?
- Because it just doesn't work that way.
- Jesus Christ! Oh f**k, it's a job getting a job in itself, is it no?
- Kinda is like that nowadays.
- Now, hold on, I just want one. For f**k's sake, I'm not greedy.
- Oh, I know you're not greedy, and to get one or to get ten, you still have to come out to the office and register with us.
- I'd rather not do that.
- You don't know whether you'd do that?
- No, I'd rather no do that.
- Then we'd rather not give you the job, because then we can no give jobs to people we haven't met, haven't vetted, haven't referenced.
- Do you do criminal records checks or no?
- No.
- That's alright then, I'd been f***d if you've done that. (laugh)
- (laugh) Now, are you coming to see us or no? Are you going to give me your number or no?
- I can no give you my number 'cause you'll phone us back, that's what I say, I just want a f***g job.
- We can no give you a job without a number.
- F**k. I'll just carry on signing on then.
- (laugh) Just give me your number, ah, oh, honest to God I'll no phone you back till we get... tell you what, I'll book you in so you can come up and register and that's it, but I still need a number.
- We'll you can make an appointment for us, but make sure it's in the afternoon because I like to sleep all morning.
-Well, then, I'm no sure we'll be able to find you a job.
- I can do the night shift, though.
- I got night shift, bloody hell, I'm crying out for night shift!
- Well, I'll do that then.
-Then you need to give me your number.
- I can no give you my number, though, because I can no f***g remember it.
- That's just not on.
- What about I phone you back. I find out the number and I'll phone you back.
- You phone back, then, but the person you need to speak to, his name is Alan.
- Alan?
- Alan, ask for Alan.
- Alright. What's your name?
- Carol.
- I'm going to report you because you've been cheeky to me, so.
- I have no been cheeky to you! (laugh)
- Ok, I'll phone back and speak to Alan later on, but I'm no giving him my number either, so.
- You no give him your number?
- No.
- Then he'll no give you a job.
- So, all I need to do is give a phone number and you give me a job? It's as easy as that?
- No, I just explained. You need to phone up, you need to speak to Alan, he'll take your number, then he'll get you booked in, then you meet Alan, then he'll give you an interview and run over what kind of work you've done before and then he'll give you a job, as long as we get clean references for you and not before that time.
- You'll get no references. I've been self-employed on the night shift all my life.
- What have you been doing?
- Burgling.
- Burgling? Then, then, then, really, obviously we can no get a reference for that, no really, you have no chance of you getting a job.
- So I'm f***d then, That's what you're saying?
- I'm not saying you're f***d exactly, but if you don't give that information, do you know?
- Aah... ah, f**k it, I'll just carry on burgling. Cheers for your help anyway.
- No bother at all. Bye. (laugh)
[*Ken is used in Scotland to mean "understand."]
Thursday, 25 April 2013
Time for some jokes
It's been a while since we had jokes. These are short and sweet:
A barber, a bald man and an absent minded professor take a journey together. They have to camp overnight, so decide to take turns watching the luggage. When it's the barber's turn, he gets restless, so amuses himself by shaving the head of the professor. When the professor is woken up for his shift, he feels his head, and says "How stupid is that barber? He's woken up the bald man instead of me."
*****
In biology class, the teacher draws a cucumber on the blackboard: "Children, could someone tell me what is this?"
Little Johnny raises his hand: "It's a dick, Miss Jones!"
The teacher bursts into tears and runs out.
In a minute the principal rushes in: "All right, what did you do now? Which one of you brought Miss Jones to tears? And who the hell drew that dick on the blackboard?"
*****
Q: What's red and invisible?
A: No tomatoes.
A barber, a bald man and an absent minded professor take a journey together. They have to camp overnight, so decide to take turns watching the luggage. When it's the barber's turn, he gets restless, so amuses himself by shaving the head of the professor. When the professor is woken up for his shift, he feels his head, and says "How stupid is that barber? He's woken up the bald man instead of me."
*****
In biology class, the teacher draws a cucumber on the blackboard: "Children, could someone tell me what is this?"
Little Johnny raises his hand: "It's a dick, Miss Jones!"
The teacher bursts into tears and runs out.
In a minute the principal rushes in: "All right, what did you do now? Which one of you brought Miss Jones to tears? And who the hell drew that dick on the blackboard?"
*****
Q: What's red and invisible?
A: No tomatoes.
Labels:
jokes
Wednesday, 24 April 2013
Gardening fever
We seem to be very enthusiastic about gardening lately... Just imagine watering all these pots!
This afternoon we're going to a large garden centre to buy some flowers for our pots on the steps and also to have a look around for seed potatoes and cherry tomato plants. I suppose that planting potatoes in containers will be less back breaking than the traditional method (not to mention that we don't have space to plant them in the soil!).
Happy gardening, everybody!
![]() |
| Container gardening in Cordoba, Spain |
This afternoon we're going to a large garden centre to buy some flowers for our pots on the steps and also to have a look around for seed potatoes and cherry tomato plants. I suppose that planting potatoes in containers will be less back breaking than the traditional method (not to mention that we don't have space to plant them in the soil!).
Happy gardening, everybody!
Labels:
gardening
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